I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
You shoulda seen me try and clean up custard from an eclair off the floor while trying to pretend to be sober for my mom. Fucking hilarious.
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