It's Friday. Sex?
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Randomize