Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
Randomize
