I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
Randomize
