just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
She just tricked me into telling her the balance of my 401k... She's like a gold digging jedi mind trick ninja
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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