Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
Randomize
