He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
