saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
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