ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
Somehow I magically turned down a threesome last night. On my birthday. You're a horrible wingman.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
i think we sleep fucked last night...
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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