Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
Randomize
