this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
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