Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
You can't just leave with hair like that
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
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