you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
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