i don't plan on having that self control this summer
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
Randomize
