If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
Is it because I queefed?
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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