I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize
