is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
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