I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Randomize
