i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
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