Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
Drunk tip #47: Its better to overestimate how many plastic bottles itll take to urinate in, rather then underestimate.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
