OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
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