Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
Just rolled over and realized my vodka goggles are not as functional as my beer goggles
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
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