just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Randomize
