I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize