is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
Randomize
