I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
