Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
Who wears a wallet chain?!
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
Randomize
