Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
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