im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
After tacos, we're chasing women.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
