At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
Randomize
