idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
Randomize
