we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
