Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
