Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
Randomize
