I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
Randomize
