why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
I want to make a zoo with you.
If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
Randomize
