Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
Randomize
