what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Randomize
