I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize
