She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Randomize
