I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
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