I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
Randomize
