Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
Pappa wants mamma naked
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
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