How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
Randomize
