So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
Randomize
