Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Randomize
