We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
The dentist just called my mother to confirm the appointment that I made on his answering machine at 4:33 am this morning..
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
so much tequila, so little girl.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
