Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
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