Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
Randomize