Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
Just remembered throwing your phone at your face in a half-drunk stupor the other morning when your alarm went off. Thought I should apologize.
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
I'm both gender and math confused
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
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