We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
Randomize